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Why do we love to watch movies about affairs and cheating? What is it about the affair? It’s steamy, it’s hidden, it’s secretive.

Cheating movies are popular because they allow a nice man or woman to imagine what it would be like to be with someone else. Or do they? They give the viewer an opportunity to dream, and to relate to the person who is cheating or to be mad and be sympathetic to the person cheated on. They spur debate, they challenge our viewpoints, they offer consolation to those who have actually created.

Overall, movies with affairs as a theme will help you both discuss the impact an affair would have on your relationship. Consider it “affair prevention.”

Here are my choices for the top ten cheating movies:

1. “Unfaithful”

Diane Lane is a wayward wife and Richard Gere is her suspicious husband in Adrian Lyne’s Unfaithful. Connie (Lane) leaves her suburban home on an errand, venturing into Manhattan during a wicked windstorm. On a trash-strewn Soho street, she literally runs into Paul Martel (Olivier Martinez), a handsome young Frenchman carrying a huge stack of books. Connie has a bad scrape on her knee, and is unable to get a cab, so Paul invites her up to his apartment. Paul is quietly flirtatious as he gives Connie some ice and a bandage for her knee. Connie phones home and explains to her son, Charlie (Erik Per Sullivan), that she’s running late. Before she leaves, Paul gives her a book of Persian poetry, The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. She mentions the encounter in passing to Edward (Gere), her husband, but it’s clear that she’s obsessing about Paul, and soon she’s back in the city, with a pretext for calling him up. Soon, they are lovers, and they grow bolder and bolder in their passion. Edward begins to suspect, and eventually gets a private investigator (Dominic Chianese of The Sopranos) to follow Connie. His worst fears confirmed Edward decides to confront Paul, a decision that will come to haunt him.

2. Fatal Attraction.

I think this is the number one most popular cheating movie of all time. When men doubt the intensity of obsession from the third party, I will steer the man towards watching this older but very relevant movie.

3.Notes On A Scandal

Based on the book, Notes On A Scandal revolves around Sheba (Cate Blanchett) a teacher whose affair with a student is uncovered by another teacher Barbara (Judi Dench), who has a history of stalking. Unfortunately, lonely Barbara uses the secret to her advantage in order to manipulate Sheba. Sheba’s husband asks her to move out of their home, so she moves into Barbara’s house, unaware that Barbara is the reason she was found out and believing the affair became known because Steven confessed it to his mother. When Sheba discovers Barbara’s diary and learns it was Barbara who leaked the story of the affair, she confronts Barbara and strikes her in anger.

Notes On A Scandal is a tragic tale of not only trusting the wrong people, but the potentially terrible repercussions an affair can have on a family and the people involved.

4. Indecent Proposal.

This movie shows what happens when the bond of marriage is broken, even if both parties mutually consent to it.

Demi Moore and Woody Harrelson star as a loving couple, David and Diana, who have fallen on hard times, and a moment of desperation tests their love for each other. A wealthy businessman, John (Robert Redford), offers the couple $1 million in exchange for one night with Diana. After much thought, the couple agrees because they really need money, however, as the months go by, knowing that his wife and John have been together drives David crazy, ultimately pushing her into John’s arms.

The questionable topic of John “buying” Diana for an evening (and only asking David’s permission, not hers) has always been criticized and the movie received poor reviews upon release. However, Indecent Proposal was a massive hit and, to this day, is a cautionary tale about desperation and the consequences of one’s actions.

5. Legends of the Fall

This was one of Brad Pitt’s earlier movies. Do you recall, the tale of three brothers? The first brother meets the woman, and she becomes his fiance’. Then, when he brings her home to his family, she falls for the second brother. The first brother then dies in battle, so the second brother gets the gal. Then, the second brother has all sorts of issues within and leaves the gal alone for many years. She finally gives up waiting for him and gets with the third brother. Then, the second brother returns and she is still in love with him. But now, it’s too late. What a tale.

6. English Patient

This movie is perhaps the saddest cheating movie of all. It has such a story behind it. The woman is cheating on her husband, and he discovers this. She goes off with the other man and their plane wrecks. The lover has to go find help to try and save her, but he doesn’t make it back in time. So it was all for nothing. Of course, there’s much more to this love story that involves cheating, but this is the gist of it.

7. The Color Purple.

The Color Purple is a movie to watch for many reasons, and cheating could be the least important reason of all. However, the cheating in this movie was almost accepted as the way people did things in that day and time. That certainly doesn’t make it right. Whoopi Goldberg had a husband, Danny Glover. She didn’t pick him, he just basically bought her from her family. Of course, he just wants her to do his cooking and cleaning and take care of his children. It’s no surprise when he then takes on a mistress, and she even comes into their home when she gets sick and stays with them. Whoopi ends up becoming attracted to the woman as well, and it is insinuated that perhaps she has an affair of her own.

8. What Lies Beneath

starring Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer.

This was a pretty spooky and realistic movie, as far as cheating movies go. In What Lies Beneath, Harrison Ford plays Norman, whose affair comes back to haunt him – literally. After noticing some strange occurrences in their house, Norman’s wife, Claire (Michelle Pfeiffer), discovers he had an affair with a woman who died and now is quite possibly haunting their house, which leads to more dark secrets coming to the surface.

9. Brokeback Mountain

The movie tells the story of Ennis (Heath Ledger) and Jack (Jake Gyllenhaal), two sheepherders who, while working at a ranch together one summer, develop feelings for each other and maintain a romantic relationship over the course of 20 years, despite marrying women. Often times movies about infidelity explore two people getting the chance to act out their passions outside of their dull marriage. However, Brokeback Mountain depicts an affair where the two people involved become free to be who they really are.

Controversial upon release for its subject matter, Brokeback Mountain broke ground for LGBTQ+ cinema.

10. Diary of a Mad Black Woman.

Okay, in this movie, she gets really mad. She’s supported her husband through thick and then, and then he wants to throw her out and be with someone else? This is a great story of revenge for someone who was cheated on.

If you can add to this list of great movies with affairs in them, let me know in the comment section below.