Men & women think very different to each other when it comes to commitment, monogamy, and attraction.

Quite simply, men are highly visual and highly sexual. It is biological and instinctive.

As a woman, you could debate this from your view point, “my man loves me for my mind”, “my man loves me because I am the mother of his children”…… and that could all be true.

But men can be attracted to another woman INSTANTLY.

As a woman, it takes more than a glance to be attracted to a man.

What does this have to do with cheating?

Well people are a polyamourous species, and monogamy requires work (consciously programming belief & value systems, having the right role models, few addictions). People can and do have multiple partners throughout there life. So SUBCONSCIOUSLY, unless we feel 100% safe, satisfied, and fulfilled…people hunt for another partner. They do this consciously or subconsciously depending on their personality type. This is human nature.

So what can YOU DO to ensure monogamy?

1. Sex must be good – Become interested in pleasing yourself as well as your partner. Sex is great if both people are enjoying themselves and responding to touch.
2. You must have sex – if you are not having sex, ask yourself why you don’t want it. Is there something medically wrong? If not, when did you check out?
3. Sex must not be stale – Try something new, get creative. Read, study, and research what others are doing in the bedroom.
4. Maintain your looks and appearance – Stay in shape & eat well. If you feel good about yourself, then you will feel positive in the bedroom, and in general!
5. Keep the passion alive! – adventure & excitement, come up with ideas for your date nights. Create an environment of intimacy, flirt with your partner! Try a couple course.
6. Talk about your values & beliefs – communicate about what your model of the world looks like, and understand what your partner thinks, rather than assume you know what they think.

I would love to know your point of view.

With Kindest Regards,

DBA, MBA, BBSc, MPsych (Clin)